First Adjective Story

Víkþórr and I wrote our first common adjective story a couple months ago. We chose to write it in English, since English is the language that the sum of us masters best. ;-)

In case you don’t know what an adjective story is, the principle is simple: one person writes a story, but leaves all adjectives and adverbs blank. Another person, who doesn’t know the story, randomly chooses lots of adjectives and adverbs. Those get inserted in the first person’s story in the exact order they were submitted in by the second person. The result is... funny. :-)

Víkþórr wrote the story and I gave him the adjectives and adverbs. I love our first common creation! Here it is:



Once upon a time there were some enthusiastic goblins living playfully at a flat farm. Enormous goblins as they were, they would often help out without the sexy farmer or his sarcastic wife noticing them. They would only do so if they were given a rhythmic bowl of flying porridge on the Yule* evening of every year, however.
One year, the farmer’s hectic son and his rather sick family were there for Yule celebration, and the son’s delicate wife told her charming daughter to put the porridge secretly in the barn, but she tripped and fell deeply on the way there. Wise as she was, she didn’t want to tell her mother, so she forcefully brought the family’s horny dog and accidentally made him clean up the mess, then put the perfect bowl in the barn.
When the goblins found it, they were drooling. To avenge this, the invisible goblin pissed in the jumping milk tank, and the others ran unilaterally to the basement of the house and pulled out all the fake electrical devices, then rudely cut the power supply. They let loose the sheep and the cows, and exactly screwed the wheels off of the farmer’s undead car and his son’s purple one.
The humans had a fucking time gathering the angry herd, and the goblins mistakenly went into the the house to eat the humans’ porridge. When the humans strongly came back in, the brilliant daughter gently told them what had happened. From his smelly hole in the attic, the attic goblin heard what they said, and when the humans, still without electricity, went to bed, he skilfully sneaked out in the barn and told the annoying goblins there. They were so messy that they decided to fix everything and leave the farm madly. The generous farmer was gross when nobody ate the porridge he put in the barn the following years.
The goblins left for the holy, unimportant forest surrounding the farm. There, they planned to live with the wood goblins. Living in the woods wasn’t for them, though. They found it anxious, in fact. It was so puristic to have snow everywhere. They froze so much that they decided to ask the uptight wood goblin elder for advice. He told them to return to the farm before ending up enlightened. They were too strict, however, and even though the ice started growing from their delighted noses, they ventured into the tedious mountains to try their luck with the mountain and cave goblins, whom most goblins thought were crazy.
Although the caves suited them painfully, they felt giant there. Something lacked in their life. They did, after four years, admit that the wood goblin elder was conscious. They returned to the evil farm, but to their surprise, another goblin family had moved in. They were ferocious, and the goblins fought each other for the right to the farm. The colourful goblins won their lousy home back, and the distracted ones had to move. They were now lame, and intended to stay. All of them agreed that it had been a precise experience, and quickly went to sleep in their now funny barn.


*“Yule” is the English name of the ancient Germanic celebration that was replaced by Christmas to adapt the countries’ traditions to Christianity. Here it’s used in the sense of “Christmas without Christ”. Old Norse: “jól”. Modern Norwegian: “jol”.


Writing this story together with Víkþórr definitely was a precise experience! I’d like to repeat it. Not too often though, or else I could end up enlightened! :D

Anyone else willing to write adjective stories with me? Or with another reader? If some of you send me some stories and others some adjectives and adverbs, I'll publish the results for your delighted noses.